In 1962, when I was four year's old and living in Great Falls, Montana, we had one black child in our neighborhood (indeed, there were only a handful of black families in our town of 30,000). One summer day, after playing in the neighborhood, I remember my Mom (a widow) asking why I didn't play with one of the kids. I replied without thought or hesitation, "Because he is a nigger".

Without a moment's hesitation, my mom backhanded me across the face - hard. Then she said, barely controlling her rage, "you will never use that word again, it is mean and evil".

I had been spanked previously, but it was after a big show to heighten the dread to make the punishable act more memorable. But this was something different. And it left an impression even now a half-century later.

Immediately thereafter, she explained everything about what was happening in civil rights, and how all people were equal and that my words could hurt people. We explored where I had come up with this idea (my cousins), and why it was so, so wrong.

The shock, followed quickly by the explanation and the talk about what this was all about, gave me an instant and lasting view of the world, and a lesson to value all people equally.

I really admire my mother. All by herself, taking a stand long before civil rights were popular. Taking a stand contrary to the rest of our extended family, whom at that time we depended upon because of her widowed status (women didn't work at that time - but after rising to the VP level of a major company in California, she went on to form her own company that she recently sold for a shit-load of money). Times were very different then - but she was way ahead of her time.

While I am not so sure about corporal punishment, I must say, this time it worked extremely well.