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top 200 commentsshow all 239

[–]GiddyWraith 544 points545 points ago

I checked out her twitter, she's just a green day fanatic mocking Bieber fans. Everyone go home, no need for pitchforks.

[–]NotABritishGuy 209 points210 points ago

But I've already lit my pitchfork! Damn!

[–]optifroculon 167 points168 points ago

And I just finished sharpening my torch, :(.

[–]WEIMDADDY 125 points126 points ago

Damn I brought out my Nokia again

[–]Averant 61 points62 points ago

sigh I'll go douse my Kindle Fire.

[–]dekor86 17 points18 points ago

Wow that really escalated.

[–]cats_are_people_too 41 points42 points ago

it's ok, they were all using iOS 6 maps.

[–]GroovenileDelinquent 8 points9 points ago

The only way to kill a Nokia: Stab it through the heart.

[–]Langly- 12 points13 points ago

[–]Raballo 4 points5 points ago

Found you out sir. The phone in the first photo is a cingular serviced phone. The one in the last one is a T-mobile serviced phone. YOU ARE A LIAR!

[–]Langly- 5 points6 points ago

I couldn't break the first one, I had to break the other. :P

[–]Raballo 2 points3 points ago

Admit it you LIED!

[–]akuta 0 points1 point ago

[–]FishBonePendant 2 points3 points ago

You didn't break it, you gave it a second antenna

[–]karan812 2 points3 points ago

Just seeing that Cingular logo after so many years gave me the fucking shivers

[–]MrMastodon 0 points1 point ago

Mans inhumanity against man is furthered by the existence of this blueprint.

[–]ikhlasy 7 points8 points ago

once my pitchfork is drawn, it shall taste blood.. mwahahahaha

[–]RaveRaptor 7 points8 points ago

Well of course you will! That steak is almost too rare.

[–]bigmike00831 3 points4 points ago

Moooooooooowww -steak

[–]MiMMFace 3 points4 points ago

Dude, I just mowed the lawn yesterday.

[–]KazzaBiss 6 points7 points ago

Mad man! You couldn't have killed someone!

[–]digitalpencil 1 point2 points ago

i hope you have a license to carry that in public, unholstered Nokias carry a severe sentence.

[–]WEIMDADDY 1 point2 points ago

What are they going to do.....I have a Nokia

[–]griffinhamilton 0 points1 point ago

Use it to knock her in the head, that brick could kill a horse.

[–]Frizk 1 point2 points ago

Fucking Overkill dude!

[–]mikev7743 -1 points0 points ago

And my axe!

[–]catherineruth 0 points1 point ago

And my banana.

[–]TheTyMan 4 points5 points ago

You mean your torchfork

[–]ulab -1 points0 points ago

Isn't that "porch"?

[–]FistOrFamine 0 points1 point ago

Pork.

[–]theghostog 1 point2 points ago

Actually that's just pitchfork shortened.

Where's the torch, guy?

[–]FistOrFamine 0 points1 point ago

No, I just like pork. Yummy...

[–]Black_Light 35 points36 points ago

This holds up. Stand down men.

[–]hobbsarelie83 11 points12 points ago

WELL, .....Damn!

[–][deleted] ago

[deleted]

[–]EternalAssasin 10 points11 points ago

r/funny has been dead. In a sense, we are all dead. Do you know why? It's all Tyrone's fault.

[–]FreefallGeek 8 points9 points ago

God damnit Tyrone, get your shit together.

[–]GroovenileDelinquent 1 point2 points ago

HE SMOKES ROCKS

[–][deleted] ago

[deleted]

[–]EternalAssasin 0 points1 point ago

I am 15, but you can see that at least a couple people thought it was funny. There is no reason to get butthurt since I was agreeing with you.

[–]bigmike00831 0 points1 point ago

Let us have our fun you fucken debby downer

[–]larsbrunsvold 4 points5 points ago

He didn't even actually dis bieber either. The context under which he referenced bieber was just that Greenday had been around way longer and was being treated like new blood.

[–]Trinitykill 4 points5 points ago

So she's not an American Idiot?

[–]Superduperdoop 3 points4 points ago

I just checked out her Twitter as well. I am 90% certain she is a robot. How can anyone tweet that much? Maybe I'm just old.

Fuck.

[–]VeryOldHero 4 points5 points ago

Just what a bored Filipino would do. Use the computer all day.

[–]mrclean808 1 point2 points ago

I second this notion.

[–]jakemyers7 6 points7 points ago

But surely OP will inform us of this?

[–]goldec 1 point2 points ago

Otherwise she wouldn't have gotten the name right.

[–]sexi_squidward 0 points1 point ago

still kind of hilarious lol

[–]Kaddus 1 point2 points ago

Too stupid to even realize Billie Joe Armstrong is the Piano Man. Not the Guy who invented the moon walk.

[–]ImBatman110595 0 points1 point ago

I already spread the legos on her floor... :(

[–]norealpurposehere2 -4 points-3 points ago

Green Day fans and Justin Bieber fans are the same people, separated by a few years.

[–]turbulentscar 1 point2 points ago

New Age Green Day Fans*

[–]kungfukai 0 points1 point ago

Pitchfork?

I was loading my shotgun.

[–]grimguitar 106 points107 points ago

He walks the lonely road on the moon.

[–]maebo121 47 points48 points ago

It's the only one he has ever known.

[–]danielkuzmin 29 points30 points ago

He doesn't know where it goes.

[–]mouldygraper 22 points23 points ago

But it's home to him and he walks alone.

[–]FlyingPasta 32 points33 points ago

Dun dun, dun dun, dun dun dun dundun

[–]aborted_bubble 6 points7 points ago

Smack my bitch up for the moon, I love this satellite!

[–]GroovenileDelinquent 7 points8 points ago

As a musician, ouch.

[–]GsusIsChord 3 points4 points ago

You dun goofed.

[–]HelmSplitter 9 points10 points ago

I'm heaving trouble trying to breath.

duh nuh, duh nuh, DUH NUH

[–]Seanzie82 5 points6 points ago

And he ain't wasting no more time...

Wait, where am I?

[–]maebo121 0 points1 point ago

Wtf Seanzie? Quit fucking around at get back to the fucking moon!

[–]NotaMethAddict 252 points253 points ago

Seriously? Can anyone explain to me why we should care that a teenage girl on Twitter said this?

[–]jyoon86 45 points46 points ago

I laughed at Billie Joe Armstrong in a space suit.

[–]WatchYourTone 30 points31 points ago

OOOOOOOOOOOOOONE FUCKING STEP FOR MAN! I'VE BEEN AROUND SINCE NINETEEN SIXTY FUCKING NINE! AND YOU GIVE US OOOOOOOOONE FUCKING GIANT LEAP FOR MANKIND!

[–]Nullvoid123 3 points4 points ago

That... made me laugh waaaay harder than it should have. Bravo.

[–]Pancakesandwich 10 points11 points ago

Me too. Lets take this bitch to the moon.

[–]chad1312 192 points193 points ago

But circlejerk.

[–]dreadredheadzedsdead 32 points33 points ago

I kind of hate how whining about circlejerks has become a circlejerk in itself.

[–]SC2minuteman 7 points8 points ago

[–]sohnemann[!] 0 points1 point ago

[–]chad1312 22 points23 points ago

Circlejerkception.

[–]gwot 3 points4 points ago

I kind of hate how whining about, whining about circlejerks has become a circlejerk in itself and itself.

[–]200cc_of_I_Dont_Care 3 points4 points ago

yo dawg...

[–]SQUID_FUCKER 194 points195 points ago

Fuck Nickelback.

[–]NinjaInYellow 161 points162 points ago

DAE Valve?

[–]grimguitar 134 points135 points ago

I am a liberal bisexual who thinks Romney is stupid and weed should be legalized. AMA!

[–]brightcityvice 111 points112 points ago

Guys, I know I'll be downvoted for this but here goes... Gaben

[–]grimguitar 97 points98 points ago

I'M GOING OFF THE RAILS ON A KARMA TRAIN!

[–]coreycubed 74 points75 points ago

KONY 2012

[–]Woman_AMA 42 points43 points ago

OMG Snorlax is the backwards hipster, he likes things way after they're cool!

[–]calicojones 41 points42 points ago

..AND MY AXE?!

[–]TheBrainofBrian 10 points11 points ago

[–]GroovenileDelinquent 0 points1 point ago

You're genius

[–]AC_Mentor 1 point2 points ago

Wouldn't slowpoke be better suited for that?

[–]theNYEHHH 11 points12 points ago

COLBY2012

[–]lilblake91 2 points3 points ago

Tay zonday

[–]BassCreat0r 2 points3 points ago

CHOO CHOO MOTHER FUCKER!!!

[–]PurpleSfinx 7 points8 points ago

Bracing for downvotes: The iPhone 5 sucks.

[–]theflyingdog 1 point2 points ago

OmGgghh /r/circlejerk is LeaKIngggg

[–]MrJay235 5 points6 points ago

LEterally Ron Paul!

[–]guns_of_navarone 1 point2 points ago

Sosososo

Bravebravebravebrave

[–]rickyrawesome 0 points1 point ago

since when has being bisexual been circlejerk-worthy?

[–]theplaidshirt 7 points8 points ago

Lelelelelele

[–]Yabbob 2 points3 points ago

EA sucks amirite?!

[–]woofers02 10 points11 points ago

Sheeple and their iPhones amirite guys?

[–]Cynical_Walrus -4 points-3 points ago

For the record, my iPhone 5 is perfect for browsing Reddit. Go Alien Blue! And walking into the local Bell store with a waiting-list and getting it within minutes!

[–]sarcasm_is_so_funny 0 points1 point ago

Hahahahahaha

[–]AppleAtrocity 8 points9 points ago

No one said we should care about it, only that it was funny. That is the subreddit we are in at the moment...or am I lost again?

[–]steviemcfly[S] 64 points65 points ago

I just thought it was funny. I'm not going to feign outrage or pretend that it's an indication that society is collapsing or whatever. Just regular old mildly-to-moderately funny.

[–]NiteShadeX2 1 point2 points ago

[–]CommentsOnOccasion 7 points8 points ago

it's sad that the standard for front page material is "mildly-to-moderately funny"

[–]nitefang 13 points14 points ago

Well, if someone would come up with something hilarious it would get upvoted. But right now we had "chuckle worthy" material, which is better than unfunny.

[–]nghtcrawler5 3 points4 points ago

It wasn't his choice to go to the frontpage.

[–]CommentsOnOccasion 0 points1 point ago

It was the choice of those who voted up. I didn't say it was his choice

[–]LFK1236 2 points3 points ago

To be fair, when's the last time you actually rolled on the floor laughing because of something you saw on the internet?

[–]steviemcfly[S] 0 points1 point ago

The standard is "painfully unfunny." But once in a while, you get something at least somewhat humorous.

[–]mrpineapplehouse 0 points1 point ago

plus a teenage girl on twitter didnt say this. My money is on "this twitter account belongs to OP"

[–]RubeusShagrid -2 points-1 points ago

Because someone was wrong on the Internet!

[–]ninja_stalker 1 point2 points ago

Oh. Hey Kyle.

[–]xMandaPandax 0 points1 point ago

Because people that think this is "funny" upvoted it... I know it's sad to me too.

[–]cryptobomb 0 points1 point ago

It's funny because it's dumb.

[–]mongolrainbows 28 points29 points ago

what a basketcase

[–]Megabean 22 points23 points ago

Hope he leaves; good riddance!

[–]kensomniac 13 points14 points ago

Seriously, that guy's such a chump.

[–]LordNick72 19 points20 points ago

You guys seem a bit jaded

[–]thats_a_risky_click 20 points21 points ago

Wake me up when this pun thread ends.

[–]Pancakesandwich 15 points16 points ago

Would you say this thread is a burnout?

[–]UNEification 14 points15 points ago

It's full of American Idiots.

[–]Matika7 7 points8 points ago

Haushinka!

[–]dingusmonger 6 points7 points ago

And when you receive my upvote, you will feel like a king for a day.

[–]MrChurchSir 7 points8 points ago

<Green Day reference>

[–]WhatsernameInsomniac 2 points3 points ago

No one knows how much this pun thread is killing me. I think I'm starting to see the light.

[–]prayingformojo 2 points3 points ago

My eyes feel like they're gonna bleed after reading these puns.

[–]SPARTAN_TOASTER 10 points11 points ago

oh im sorry bitch is WALKING ON THE MOTHER FUCKING MOON NOT IMPRESSIVE ENOUGH!

[–]mindaika 13 points14 points ago

I am strongly in favor of sending Justin Bieber to space.

[–]fivepercentsure 4 points5 points ago

<Maniacle laughter> yes, YES! We must do this!

[–]Xenc 4 points5 points ago

You dropped your maniacle.

[–]Luckymusing 7 points8 points ago

No, she's obviously thinking of Lance Armstrong.

[–]animalparty 13 points14 points ago

From N*Sync?

[–]CmonGuys 9 points10 points ago

No, the one that plays the trumpet

[–]Xenc 7 points8 points ago

From N*Sync?

[–]AssFromThePast 1 point2 points ago

Sasquatch!

[–]Rosetti 2 points3 points ago

That or Stretch Armstrong.

[–]3030threat 12 points13 points ago

[–]Allurex 21 points22 points ago

[–]volcomma5ter 3 points4 points ago

I don't know why, but this made me laugh out loud. A lot.

[–]Jeppesk 2 points3 points ago

I find this especially hilarious, when you think about how Justin Bieber knows nothing about music either. Ever tried analysing one of his songs? It is so musically simple that it's almost embarassing to have it in this world.

[–]MyNameIsNotJeff 2 points3 points ago

Too soon.

[–]woozey69 4 points5 points ago

This joke is flying over so many heads it looks like superman.

[–]lilblake91 1 point2 points ago

I still don't get it

[–]woozey69 0 points1 point ago

[–]CelestialRose 1 point2 points ago

Am I the only one who noticed that girl's eyebrows?

[–]ENKC 1 point2 points ago

Yes.

[–]lilblake91 1 point2 points ago

It actually took me awhile to realize there was a girl there

[–]move_yourself 1 point2 points ago

no

[–]t1mbuk2 0 points1 point ago

WHY THE FUCK IS IT IN QUOTATIONS?

[–]Waffleman75 0 points1 point ago

I don't wanna live on this planet anymore

[–]virtualmatrix555 1 point2 points ago

Oh man, check her twitter now...she's about to implode. Damn, she protected her account

[–]Meezyification 1 point2 points ago

What the actual FUCK. Kids these days.

[–]el_bhm -1 points0 points ago

I don't get it.

[–]xano95 1 point2 points ago

armstrong

[–]sweetiet1180 1 point2 points ago

This reminds me of the dumbass girl who wondered why we couldn't land on the sun at night because its obviously like, 30 degrees colder at night. F-ing idiot.

[–]imsweetinreality 0 points1 point ago

Damn and I just had my forks resharpened. I was ready to go on a rant of why women shouldnt be able to vote, or be left to their own device outside of the kitchen

[–]putin_my_ass 0 points1 point ago

"Have you ever walked on the moon?"

"Have you ever walked on the moon?"

"Have you ever walked on the moon?"

"Have you ever...rolled on the moon?"

[–]shifty1032231 0 points1 point ago

What's wrong with kids these days.

[–]RockFerrit 0 points1 point ago

No, but greenday did...

[–]9212 0 points1 point ago

Billy Joe Armstrong best Armstrong.

[–]cycophuk 0 points1 point ago

Yeah, yeah, we get it. Young female Bieber fans are not educated. Neither was I when I was 13.

[–]ZebubXIII 0 points1 point ago

dem eyebrows

[–]narwhal4prez 0 points1 point ago

come on you guys! i came hre expecting all the obligatory green day song puns! way to let me down :(

[–][deleted] ago

[deleted]

[–]MackDeeZee 0 points1 point ago

The stupid! It burns!

[–]horserockpolejock 1 point2 points ago

Don't feed the troll.

[–]SecularMC 0 points1 point ago

Anyone with the last name Armstrong must be a goddamn astronaut.

[–]mgriff2k4 -2 points-1 points ago

I got curious, now im depressed...

Billie Joe Armstrong Net Worth

Justin Bieber Net Worth

[–]ENKC 2 points3 points ago

Please excuse while I proceed to not shed a single tear.

[–]russelln 0 points1 point ago

Why does this make you depressed? They are both worth ridiculous amounts of money for what they contribute to the world.

[–]CrazyOldRussian -5 points-4 points ago

This is clearly a real photo, I can tell because of the pixels and having seen quite a few shops in my day.

[–]chargedcreeper -2 points-1 points ago

just reading that gave me chest pains

[–]Excaliburkid -5 points-4 points ago

You people are so stupid

[–]Melvar_10 0 points1 point ago

No, just foolish thank you very much.

[–]trobke -4 points-3 points ago

I just want to kick this girl in the face... and Bieber as well.

[–]DR_REEVE -4 points-3 points ago

That bitch should get shot

[–][deleted] ago

[deleted]

[–]DriizzyDrakeRogers 4 points5 points ago

You are a very gullible person.

[–]cyberocket 0 points1 point ago

I don't think you remember being a teenager. Seriously, you were very likely THAT much more stupid than you actually recall.