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top 200 commentsshow all 342

[–]sweetloris 302 points303 points ago

One pixel.

[–]Japanistan 222 points223 points ago

[–]SuperPowers97 73 points74 points ago

Even though I've seen that picture about a thousand times, I still click the link every time.

[–]saywee123 26 points27 points ago

As do I. And I still laugh like a fucking hyena.

[–]th1nker 0 points1 point ago

And silently, you hope it remains the same.

[–]Blakaflaka 10 points11 points ago

What is the picture of? I can see a hat but that's about it.

[–]MikeTheInfidel 20 points21 points ago

Which is weird, because it started off as a photo of the Mona Lisa.

[–]JustinHopewell 8 points9 points ago

Looks like a guy with a banjo to me.

[–]Goto10 2 points3 points ago

I see a monkey in a cowboy hat playing a banjo also.

[–]GeorgeForemanGrillz 2 points3 points ago

It's funny how even on the lowest zoom level on RES it still looks like shit. Fucking bicubic + bilinear resizing is hilarious to me.

[–]Lasercat77 0 points1 point ago

It looks like someone wearing a ushanka(sp?) while playing the banjo.

[–]theminecraftdude 2 points3 points ago

Can I get this in HD?

[–]dumbasswaiter 48 points49 points ago

[–]gmnitsua 1080 points1081 points ago

I can't believe you guys are this closed-minded. Touching each other's dicks really isn't that gay. Straight people can touch each other's dicks all the time, and it's totally fine. Some European countries literally greet each other with a hand job. Dick fondling is actually fairly common-place.

-Said no one ever.

[–]hnakhi 381 points382 points ago

I actually thought you were serious before reading who said that...

[–]brettyrocks 116 points117 points ago

he lost me at european.

[–]xxllamacornxx 16 points17 points ago

I think it would be nice to greet people with handjobs. Unless the guy is ugly and smells bad.

[–]ScottyDntKnow 1 point2 points ago

Hi, nice to meet you!

[–]eamantite 1 point2 points ago

Or Mr. McWartyhands

[–]stephentheatronach 4 points5 points ago

Is he gay, or European.

[–]Falroy 13 points14 points ago

Upvotes for all of you on this thread.

[–]Serial_Masturbator 59 points60 points ago

Hello. I am Prince Bolkiah of Nigeria. I am writting in earnest to seek assistance. I dispatched a sum of five hundred million USD to U.S. banks and I need your help to retrieve it. Simply wire $50,000 into my offshore bank account and we can proceed from there! Best Wishes, Prince Bolkiah

[–]ClosetPoly 37 points38 points ago

You spelled your name the same every time you wrote it. That's how I know you're not Nigerian.

[–]CRRZ 0 points1 point ago

I knew by "earnest".

[–]canDANIan 8 points9 points ago

Guys, I think this is a scam. DON'T SHOW HIM THE MONEY!

[–]FriendTherapist 7 points8 points ago

Is the hand job still in the cards?

[–]haybecca 34 points35 points ago

ah, yes. the ole' third base hand shake.

[–]evilbob 17 points18 points ago

There is a tribe in Papua New Guinea where the males greet each other by gripping each others penis like a handshake.

[–]RedditAddict11 31 points32 points ago

I salute the guy who started this tradition and convinced the rest of the tribe that this is a totally normal thing to do. After it caught on, he must have thought, "wow, I can't believe I actually pulled it off."

[–]evilbob 47 points48 points ago

pulled it off

Hehe.

[–]th1nker 11 points12 points ago

In my country, it's completely normal to literally slide on your knees face first into someone's crotch, then suck their dick to say hello. In fact, it is considered a formal greeting.

[–]FriendTherapist 5 points6 points ago

What's the informal greeting? I like to pretend like I fit in when I go places.

[–]mr_pleco 133 points134 points ago

I can't believe you guys are this closed-minded.

:|

Touching each other's dicks really isn't that gay.

-.-

Straight people can touch each other's dicks all the time, and it's totally fine.

O.o

Some European countries literally greet each other with a hand job.

O.O

Dick fondling is actually fairly common-place.

ಠ_ಠ

-Said no one ever.

xD

[–]connathan 26 points27 points ago

Nice breakdown

[–]jzerocoolj 75 points76 points ago

I like how this progressed.

[–]southernasshole 2 points3 points ago

For a second there I was thinking this was serious before I got to the end.

[–]anarkhist 2 points3 points ago

Now, I'm disappointed.

[–]awesomebbq 1 point2 points ago

What's weird is that I actually started agreeing with you.

[–]gupsy 134 points135 points ago

Alright what am I looking at here?

[–]derpMD 93 points94 points ago

Looks like a few kids playing grabass/dodgedick. Not sure of the context.

[–]Viking_Lordbeast 33 points34 points ago

I'm having a hard time telling if it's different kids in each photo or what. That still doesn't explain the title and that I see 0 erections, just dudes grabbing dudes' junk(s?). What am I missing here?

[–]MagicBox101 86 points87 points ago

It's a pun, these boys are from a boy band called One Direction.

[–]didntVoteObama 40 points41 points ago

Thanks for explaining, I have never heard of this band fortunately.

[–]lechatron 35 points36 points ago

They all got chlamydia from a Koala Bear which is the only reason I had ever heard of them.

[–]didntVoteObama 44 points45 points ago

Please be serious please be serious please be serious

[–]qwertyuiop34567 23 points24 points ago

[–]sneeze_trigger 22 points23 points ago

"One Direction in chlamydia scare after handling koalas Down Under"

If only 'koalas' were a euphemism for something...

[–]Nobby_Nobbs 7 points8 points ago

I sometimes refer to my genitals as a marsupial due to it frequently going in "pouches."

[–]OBrien 1 point2 points ago

Also 'down under'

[–]froglegsoup 0 points1 point ago

Koala's aren't a euphemism. They're a cover story.

[–]jzzanthapuss 0 points1 point ago

i had to scroll back up to see if i was reading The Onion

[–]wowwow23 5 points6 points ago

[–]didntVoteObama 6 points7 points ago

TIL to never, ever pick up a koala bear. Even though I'll probably never have the chance.

[–]crazykoala 9 points10 points ago

I've been to a World's Fair, a picnic, and a rodeo and that's the stupidest thing I ever heard.

Koala wingman reporting for duty. You need to check that attitude at the door. At the end of your life you end up regretting the things you wanted but never gave an honest effort. You just need some confidence. You're smart, witty, and not half bad lookin'. Drink this. Here's some Eclipse gum. Now get out there and use your best line on that spicy salsa number by the jukebox.

[–]lakerswiz 2 points3 points ago

AND IT WAS FUCKING TRUE!

[–]Norass411 3 points4 points ago

Must've handled Reggie

[–]evilbob 2 points3 points ago

Koalas are not bears.

[–]inormallyjustlurkbut 6 points7 points ago

Apparently reddit is a great place to learn all about what teenage boys are hating these days.

[–]didntVoteObama 0 points1 point ago

One Erection Direction - the new NSync!

[–]bossmcsauce 0 points1 point ago

sounds about right. really, it sounds like most of the internet is a good place to learn about that sort of stuff. It's awash with teenage boys raging about this and that.

[–]MagicBox101 8 points9 points ago

It really depends on what kind of music you like, i personally don't like them, and most redditors don't, but they are fairly popular among teens.

[–]DannyBoyPlaysGuitar 4 points5 points ago

Actually, they're not. Source: I am a teenager and all of my teenage friends hate them as well.

[–]MagicBox101 4 points5 points ago

Well what kind of envoirment are you in?

I live in NYC and a large majority of the already large crowd here love One Direction, with the exception of some.

There will always be different opinions.

[–]impshial 4 points5 points ago

All 3 of my daughters love them and all of their friends do as well. They are also HEAVILY played on the local pop stations.

[–]revoopychris 4 points5 points ago

Preteens.

[–]S_Cheeks 6 points7 points ago

Is it shameful that I am 23 and get extremely excited when their song comes on at the bar?

[–]Strykforce 6 points7 points ago

No. Like whatever kind of music you want.

[–]damunzy 5 points6 points ago

Catchy tune: One Direction - What Makes You Beautiful

Makes me want to cut a rug. Or koala.

ಠ_ರೃ

[–]Tipsymidget 2 points3 points ago

You lucky son of a bitch.

[–]lalophobia 0 points1 point ago

Thanks, I fortunately haven't heard of them yet ;-)

[–]rizwan_k 0 points1 point ago

Oh, you're having a hard time? let me give you a hand. HAHAHAHAHAH

[–]steezywonder 3 points4 points ago

I dont know about all of the pictures but if you look at the middle one in the top row his hand is backwards its obviously shopped.

[–]wtfmanquestionmark 111 points112 points ago

It would be funny if that guy always did it just to fuck with people.

[–]steamfolk 51 points52 points ago

I'm working off a theory that's almost exactly what they're doing. No such thing as bad press and all that, and they've already proven they'll do whatever it takes to get people talking.

[–]Sumidor 10 points11 points ago

What have they done in the past?

[–]steamfolk 9 points10 points ago

I remember there being a big stink fairly recently about them buying off an MTV contest.

[–]rainydayglory 2 points3 points ago

i really hope you're right. it's damn hilarious as a joke.

[–]2fingersuplightbrown 1 point2 points ago

Nah, I think it's because it's a band created for teenage girls. Teenage girls love gay. Stage gay is a big thing out there. Source: have been on Tumblr and Livejournal for two years, also I'm a teenage girl.

[–]cagedit 230 points231 points ago

You know you can call that guy gay all you want but every single one of us clicked a link titled "One Erection"

[–]anyways_vs_anyway 23 points24 points ago

Bitch please, I clicked it because it was blue.

[–]lagavulin16yr 95 points96 points ago

It's posted in funny without a NSFW flag. Totally legit.

[–]Ballpit_Inspector 24 points25 points ago

Admit it, it could have been in another sub, with a NSFW tag and you still would've clicked it.

[–]lagavulin16yr 8 points9 points ago

Totally legit.

[–]River_Jones 6 points7 points ago

I browse /r/all and I click links, even NSFW links with no discretion. The shit I've seen because of that...

[–]FoxDown 13 points14 points ago

As opposed to the rest of my internet history, this is extremely tame.

[–]josephanthony 7 points8 points ago

I live in fear that Google will contact me one day, and blackmail me into doing all sorts of heinous deeds, using my internet history as leverage.

[–]klaq 5 points6 points ago

back in my day boy bands at least tried to make it look like they werent gay.

[–]reddit-ulous 4 points5 points ago

RES removes that burden of choice for you by opening all the images in the same page. That way, you haven't actively clicked on something incriminating, it was just open while you were looking.

[–]Eros_Narcissus 1 point2 points ago

Most of us aren't pretending not to be.

[–]froglegsoup 0 points1 point ago

Look. I came here through Imgur.

[–]SoloJones 25 points26 points ago

Where is my life going that I just looked at all of these

[–]noking 23 points24 points ago

So are these guys actually gay or what? Reaction depends.

[–]PretendImGoku 19 points20 points ago

See Ouran High School Host Club

[–]rebelcupcake 4 points5 points ago

wait so one of them is a girl...? i would watch that.

[–]ginandregret 26 points27 points ago

They aren't supposed to be. They're in a boy band that's very popular with young teenage girls.

[–]chewp911 12 points13 points ago

Lance Bass?

[–]lakerswiz 0 points1 point ago

You know, after thinking about it, aside from the straight up penis grabbing, most of the stuff they do is done by close male friends all the time. The only difference is that these guys look incredibly feminine without any hint of being manly.

[–]SystematicDemon 16 points17 points ago

This link is my new weapon. Thank you sir

[–]Reshak 45 points46 points ago

[–]JustinHopewell 1 point2 points ago

I've got some valuable trinkets I found just laying about in this graveyard. If you were to buy them, what kind of price would you offer?

[–]PsychoNerd91 15 points16 points ago

I don't care if they're gay (They're honestly not hiding anything). They're cute!

That said. I've not listened to any one of their songs.

[–]ApplesnPie 0 points1 point ago

I listened to one, just like I did for justin bieber or rihanna to see if my hate for them was justified. It was, and it is for one direction. They're just terrible and they're only a cute face for teenage girls to fall in love with

[–]palpablescalpel 2 points3 points ago

Whoa. I have the weirdest ladyboner right now.

[–]GoldLegends 3 points4 points ago

Ehh, most of em looked like things my friends and I do. But we don't do it publicly haha. Oh we're not gay.

[–]TheMightySpork 13 points14 points ago

Your friends probably have a secret or two.

[–]Strykforce 2 points3 points ago

I did this with my friend too. And then we had sex drunk one night.

[–]bonyhawk 4 points5 points ago

You guys kiss each other and touch each other's junk?

[–]GoldLegends 3 points4 points ago

It's really hard to explain without actually knowing us as a group of friends and in person, but no we don't "kiss" we place our hands over their cheeks/lips then kiss. And yes, we kinda touch each other's junk.

[–]AwSunnyDeeFYeah 1 point2 points ago

Yeah all my friends (graduates of college) still joke around like this, it's pretty normal.

[–]OneoftheZombies 2 points3 points ago

I dont know who these guys are, but as someone who was a HUGE J-pop fan in my teenage years, I seriously dont see anything weird about this.

Is there something wrong with me?

[–]fortinwithwill 39 points40 points ago

yes.

[–]gucci_flocka_flame 17 points18 points ago

its not gay unless the balls touch

[–]crenshizzle 0 points1 point ago

It's not gay when it's in a three way

[–]SerasAtomsk 57 points58 points ago

Members of a boyband might be gay? Shocking. Does anyone else not care?

[–]weenerhole 17 points18 points ago

I not care as well.

[–]Atomic_Rarity 12 points13 points ago

As don't I.

[–]paranode 15 points16 points ago

Gay is different than publicly fondling your band members.

[–]johncow22 5 points6 points ago

*band's members

[–]knightofmars 0 points1 point ago

Gay or not, why are they covering each others crotches?

[–]mewsick26 8 points9 points ago

Harry is so handsy.

[–]marty86morgan 7 points8 points ago

I only know enough about this group to get the play off their name, but this is a plus for them in my book. It's pretty funny to me that they are making grabs at each others' junk so often while people are taking photos. I can identify with it. It's basically the way every guy I knew at that age would have behaved while posing for a photo.

[–]tommybread 17 points18 points ago

It's the same dude dick-grabbing every time, it's just a joke.

[–]Degree_in_BS 13 points14 points ago

I mean...would it be such a bad thing if they were gay? They are icons of a very influential age group, maybe it would help some of the younger ones relate or at least help kill the stigma. We had Lance Bass.

shrugs if ya gay, ya gay.

[–]px403 0 points1 point ago

Even if they were gay I really don't think it sets a great example that to express yourself you need to molest your friends in public. Just like I don't think it would be cool if a straight guy in a band with women grabbed their breasts and crotches in every damn photoshoot. It's just tacky.

[–]MeteorThree 14 points15 points ago

[–]TheOnlyUsernameLeft3 38 points39 points ago

I don't understand why they are constantly grabbing each other's junk... and being gay is not an explanation. It's still inapropriate

[–]authorless 69 points70 points ago

It is probably an inside joke they have, or some kind of contest to see who can get the most hilarious pic or who they can make feel the most uncomfortable.

[–]ilanimage 12 points13 points ago

They say they're doing it to get attention. And apparently it's working.

[–]tocool4mysocks 2 points3 points ago

No it's only Harry the curly haired one

[–]tnicholson 1 point2 points ago

Take it easy, Dad.

[–]trivas 16 points17 points ago

[–]jacqueofalltrades 15 points16 points ago

http://hahgay.com/?/loop

(for next time)

[–]slayersaiez 3 points4 points ago

That girls eyes blink when he says "ha" and she looks over when he says gay. It's all I notice now.

[–]laughs_at_your_fail 12 points13 points ago

to rule them all!

[–]WhiteMorganFreeman 8 points9 points ago

It's Mine...My precious

[–]VeronicaChristine 11 points12 points ago

No one can resist Louis Tomlinson's ass. Not even Zayn.

[–]tocool4mysocks 5 points6 points ago

It's true his ass is the sassyiest ass in the world that no man or woman can resist

[–]rubberduckytr2 3 points4 points ago

In all but one of the pictures, it's the same guy grabbing someone elses junk
ಠ_ಠ

[–]drburropile 13 points14 points ago

In american high school football the quarter back touches the fattest guy on the team in the butthole and balls for 4 months straight.

[–]gman94 10 points11 points ago

So what if they are gay? The issue here is that teenage girls keep listening to terrible music loudly. Let'em touch dicks if they like. I think it's a funny double standard about reddit. "Oh you are gay? That's chill, come have a beer." "Oh you are a boyband? you must be a faggot."

[–]salsaheaven 13 points14 points ago

Who is this and why are they not allowed to be gay?

[–]corvett 5 points6 points ago

"One Direction" - A boy-band popular in America that markets their songs to insecure teenage girls, with songs like "You've got that one thing" [read: "You've got a pussy"] and "You don't know you're beautiful."

If they were gay, they might risk losing their entire audience (middle school girls). Then again, they might get a new audience (middle school gay boys).

[–]MuffinsandTeacups 3 points4 points ago

Actually, lot's of girls I know are infatuated with gay guys...

It's a case of people always want what they cant have.

[–]bvanman 2 points3 points ago

So is nobody going to note that on the one top center, a right hand has been photoshopped in where a left hand should be?

[–]matadora79 1 point2 points ago

I just think they are foreign and more comfortable with their sexuality.

[–]HeyItsOlivia 5 points6 points ago

And Reddit's maturity level lowers once again.

[–]Dragoryu3000 2 points3 points ago

Oh hey. They might be gay. Cool.

[–]MFchimichanga 7 points8 points ago

It's not gay if you- no....never mind it's still gay.

[–]GoodLawdAlmighty 10 points11 points ago

This is shopped. Look at those red rings around the hands, you really think people have large red circles around their hands? Someone definitely hacked into One Directions mainframe and edited those rings into the picture.

[–]EggoFreak 5 points6 points ago

You probably made people from /r/OneDirection very angry.

[–]tocool4mysocks 2 points3 points ago

They have a subreddit for 1D why was I not informed of this!!!

[–]freefucks 1 point2 points ago

I think One Direction fans make fun of them more than the people who hate them. This is mild compared to what most fans say.

[–]greenelise 6 points7 points ago

SUPAH GAAAY

[–]Mazzygos 5 points6 points ago

I knew it!

[–]AffableJack 0 points1 point ago

Are they actually grabbing each others' cocks?

[–]memeaddictedchick 1 point2 points ago

I feel like its probably a running joke with them. But I don't know..I know nothing about these boys.

[–]delaflores 2 points3 points ago

Not going to lie, when I clicked on this I expected an asain doing something political related...

[–]smadesigns 2 points3 points ago

Who the fuck is this, goddam I learned the word yolo on reddit as well.

[–]ilanimage 2 points3 points ago

I don't understand. Do you people support gay people or don't you? Could someone explain?

[–]Daniani 4 points5 points ago

This is being pointed out for the same reason a woman openly grabbing her male co-star/bandmates crotch in pictures would be pointed out.

It's weird, gay or not.

[–]alaskangamer777 3 points4 points ago

[–]Libbers9 3 points4 points ago

as a One Direction fan, I can assure you that yes, they are in fact very gay

[–]jsenior6 0 points1 point ago

[–]Lucas753 0 points1 point ago

I think its the same guy doing it.

[–]DrZicter 1 point2 points ago

Butt erections: they can strike at anytime.

[–]Irishguy317 -1 points0 points ago

?

Edit: Sorry, I just don't understand.

[–]ara_p 1 point2 points ago

Needs more GIF

[–]LavaIcicle -1 points0 points ago

Wait, what?

[–]Dekar173 -1 points0 points ago

Why is that dude holding the other dude's wang in all those pictures? I really want to know. Are these slips, or did the photographer tell him his hand NEEDED to be there?

[–]LondonTiger 0 points1 point ago

wow, its the same guy grabbing the dick every time

[–]tinygiraffegirl 0 points1 point ago

It's always the curly-hair guy...

[–]ColdFalcon 0 points1 point ago

is this your family or something?

[–]blackjackvip 0 points1 point ago

Is mild homoeroticism funny now? are we laughing at this? QUICK Get R/Kpop over here STAT. All your favorite Shinee gifs! All your favorite "Fan Service"!

[–]kylea1 0 points1 point ago

two directions

[–]southernasshole 0 points1 point ago

That's a lot of dick clutching for a "christian band".

(that's there gimmick isn't it?)

[–]jp_lolo 0 points1 point ago

why is he grabbing everyones junk?

[–]alienufosarereal 0 points1 point ago

I think it's fucking funny. Like, imagine if you and your friends stumbled into being a teen pop boy-band. I would totally do shit like this.

[–]benrbls 0 points1 point ago

That may be the dick-grabbingest boy band member since Lance Bass.

[–]andnowforme0 1 point2 points ago

surprise, surprise... a boy band is gay

[–]ILikeMyBlueEyes 0 points1 point ago

So is that dude actually gabbing the other due's junk? Or is this photoshopped?

[–]flavorjunction 0 points1 point ago

We make each other laugh, grabbing each other’s bums.”

Source.

[–]Cats4Karma 0 points1 point ago

I thought this was going to be a teen sex awareness "One Erection - 5 Children" to detour teens from sex. Though, 5 would be quite a bit unless she was on fertilization drugs

[–]iowno 0 points1 point ago

anyone else notice it was the same guy in every pic?

[–]twistedcrayon 0 points1 point ago

The fans even admit they believe they're gay, apparently recently one of the members called bullshit on it on twitter and fans are obsessing over it... I seriously don't care if someone's gay. You're gay? Okay that changes nothing.

[–]Getinthecart 0 points1 point ago

Holy shit

[–]DerpingItUp 0 points1 point ago

HOT.

[–]Nayr91 0 points1 point ago

[–]berserker87 0 points1 point ago

Why are these childred touching each other's dicks?

Also, I'm really excited that I have no idea who this is. I'm an adult!

[–]lyok0929 0 points1 point ago

Isn't their album named 'Up All Night'?

[–]smittenimp92 0 points1 point ago

Makes me wonder if its the camera guy "ok move over to the left a bit, ok a little more, and for the love of God would someone please grab some genitals!"

[–]Gui1tyspark 0 points1 point ago

AMA Request: One Direction Dick Grabber -

  1. Why?

[–]RAGE-RAGE-RAGE 0 points1 point ago

One Erection: Up All Night.

[–]Grimreaper023 0 points1 point ago

This seems to explain a lot. seems...

[–]ZeUberpresident 1 point2 points ago

I noticed that the crotch grabber is the same guy every time.

[–]almox21 0 points1 point ago

GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY

[–]Youcanbeasuperhero2 0 points1 point ago

This explains a lot.