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top 200 commentsshow 500

[–]BobTehCat 250 points251 points ago

So basically, OP just took a top comment and submitted it as his own?

Reddit.

[–]Schroedingers_gif 63 points64 points ago

So it goes.

[–]mmmhmmhim 32 points33 points ago

Poo-tee-weet

[–]OoogaOoogaYoink 2 points3 points ago

Anything for an imaginary digital number, riiiiiiight?

[–]burritoxman 61 points62 points ago

is this the same tyrone in the last image?

[–]Lincoln33 84 points85 points ago

No, it's not.

[–]alreadytakenusername 135 points136 points ago

But they are both black!

[–]Yesod 54 points55 points ago

[–]Munt_Custard 9 points10 points ago

I miss Dave.

[–]calicojones 30 points31 points ago

..so yeah.

[–]DangerousIdeas 39 points40 points ago

No I think that was Will Smith.

[–]gordonz88 15 points16 points ago

Nah, that's Morgan Freeman

[–]GeorgeTaylorG 19 points20 points ago

Enough joking guys... It's obviously Obama.

[–]Yesod 6 points7 points ago

[–]D14BL0 14 points15 points ago

Dude, it's Lawrence Fishburn, you racist asshole.

[–]Raufflecopter 15 points16 points ago

No, this is the guy from Tropic Thunder.

[–]IVIalefactoR 4 points5 points ago

No, that was just a dude playing a dude disguised as another dude.

[–]spikey666 4 points5 points ago

[–]damnatio_memoriae 8 points9 points ago

What you try'na say? They all look alike to you??

[–]snow_globe_life 6 points7 points ago

Well... ummmmm....... yeah?

[–]zenmunster 30 points31 points ago

[–]ItsDanimal 9 points10 points ago

And above that is this exact meme, but 11 days older...

[–]NancyGracesTesticles 8 points9 points ago

I thought it was the dude from "Call Tyrone". I figured he finally made good by Erykah Badu.

[–]Scrauz 4 points5 points ago

[–]Kon-chezz 2 points3 points ago

Good shit Tyrone.

[–]eddygoombah 145 points146 points ago

Dr Tyrone Hayes comes into my restaurant Jupiter almost every day for lunch, usually accompanied by a number of his students. He's one of the nicest regulars we have. I can't wait to show him this tomorrow.

ha!

Edit: Probably won't show him this since everyone is telling me that it's racist. I wasn't familiar with the meme previously. Thanks for the warnings.

[–]Zrob 30 points31 points ago

You work at Jupiter? Sweet. I pass by it occasionally....

[–]runnershighxc 26 points27 points ago

How fucking long is your commute

[–]eddygoombah 18 points19 points ago

either 76 years... or 20 minutes. I forget

[–]eddygoombah 25 points26 points ago

yup. I'm the GM

[–]jayhawk503 14 points15 points ago

NOW KISS

[–]Johanasburg_Flowers 6 points7 points ago

For once I understand the local references.

[–]nicholasCageSucks 2 points3 points ago

Are you a comet?

[–]eddygoombah 7 points8 points ago

I think I'm more of a gas giant according to my gf.

[–]chiropter 8 points9 points ago

don't do that, it will be very awkward.

I've seen that guy give a job talk, so he is not just some dude to me. he grew up very poor, but fell in love with science and is a really positive role model for some underrepresented groups.

[–]IthinktherforeIthink 14 points15 points ago

Make sure you show him the context here first. It would add to the punchline with his face in it. Also, it wouldn't seem as racist as it does without the context.

[–]Obsi2 41 points42 points ago

The context doesn't help at all.

[–]Brisco_County_III 12 points13 points ago

Not even slightly. Yay, Reddit.

Edit to point out that Ithink's comment is saying that without the context it wouldn't seem as racist.

[–]MrMooga 16 points17 points ago

It's pretty racist with or without

[–]kimcheekumquat 5 points6 points ago

AMA?

[–]guttata 566 points567 points ago

Dr. Hayes does some fantastic work on the effects of atrazine on amphibian development. He's an incredibly entertaining speaker, and he ends every talk with a rap. Very, very cool guy.

[–]RCcola159 229 points230 points ago

I can confirm. His lectures on atrazine are some of the best I've ever sat through. Entertaining yet extremely educational

[–]Wont_Google_Anything 280 points281 points ago

what the fuck is atrazine

[–]uk2knerf 110 points111 points ago

Explain it like I'm 5.

[–]iamaturkeykillme 92 points93 points ago

Atrazine is an herbicide that causes frogs to change gender and shrivels human testes into useless scraps of tissue.

[–]Harry_Tuttle 107 points108 points ago

Sounds like my ex-wife.

[–]free_dead_puppy 17 points18 points ago

Oh ho ho!

[–]implicate 26 points27 points ago

Go home, Santa. You're drunk.

[–]mdax8414 2 points3 points ago

Zingasaurus rex

[–]Hoooooooar 514 points515 points ago

Drink that shit yo babies gona be fucked nigga.

[–]midnightsbane04 382 points383 points ago

He said 5, not hoodrat.

[–]Viend 170 points171 points ago

Why you hatin on 5 y/o hoodrats dawg?

[–]reddez 52 points53 points ago

This reminds me of that 7 year old boy who drove a truck around town to do "hoodrat" things with his "fwends".

[–]ClutchPapi34 40 points41 points ago

it's fun to do bad things

[–]BecauseTheyDeserveIt 16 points17 points ago

Latarian Milton? I hear he has a friend who smokes wiff cig-uh-rettes

[–]Iamkazam 47 points48 points ago

[–]ckuiper 39 points40 points ago

Explain it like I'm 5.

Explain it like I'm jive.

[–]AcerRubrum 41 points42 points ago

You see my man, this whole chuck em up bout swamp slicks goin six feet under comin bit me in da ass cuz Im usin ma expulsion potion on dem wishy washy weeds dat be harshin ol macdonalds crops

[–]groomingfluid 7 points8 points ago

d'awww sheeeet.

[–]bigsz 33 points34 points ago

Because 5 year olds know what 'nigga' means.

[–]Tactful 53 points54 points ago

The streets is my daycare, getme?

[–]SparklepireBETCH 7 points8 points ago

10/10 would snort again.

[–]lbtrigger 8 points9 points ago

I mean, some do. Probably.

ninja edit: unfortunately

[–]IAMA_Ghost_Boo 7 points8 points ago

More like nigga edit, dat shit came outa no where.

[–]tooCheezy 4 points5 points ago

Well shit.

[–]Harry_Tuttle 5 points6 points ago

That's one, um, urban 5 year-old right thurr.

[–]pandamarine 13 points14 points ago

From my lecture notes: "frogs exposed to atrezine grow eggs in their balls... Atrezine=bad"

[–]CoreyRogerson 10 points11 points ago

Weed killer.

[–]nikomo 7 points8 points ago

It's got what plants crave.

[–]Jymotion 12 points13 points ago

I'm always curious as to what goes through people's minds when they make and spend time on such shitty novelty accounts.

Edit: I said this when he had one point. I guess I just don't get it.

[–]UsernameNumbers 11 points12 points ago

I like this one. I feel like it can make people feel bad about not googling things that are easily googled. And I like that.

[–]Opie59 3 points4 points ago

Or it can make people who don't automatically link to something begrudgingly do it. For instance, I sure as shit wasn't going to google atrazine. I really didn't care. But now I know. It's that thing with the stuff.

[–]Sphinxster55 25 points26 points ago

YouTube from Silent Spring to Silent Night. Atrazine makes your balls form fucking eggs. It chemically castrates you. This man is a genius.

[–]knoxblox 9 points10 points ago

Helllllo fellow Berkley dwellers!

*Edit - Leaving Berkeley misspelled to honor my failure.

[–]purpletomato1 19 points20 points ago

[–]dealincatastrophe 16 points17 points ago

Literally the best professor I've ever had. His lectures on human endocrinology at Cal were amazing.

[–]shirtface 8 points9 points ago

Any way we could view one of his lectures? He sounds like an awesome guy

edit: spelling

[–]double_J25 9 points10 points ago

His lectures probably aren't webcasted. However I did find a TED talk video he was in.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X9NFPZGyDPg

[–]hazie 7 points8 points ago

I cannot imagine this guy rapping after a lecture. He sounds whiter than me.

[–]Eponymatic 8 points9 points ago

And judging from the searching for him on twitter, he has some deep philosophy n shit too:

"Student: Is the final cumulative? Tyrone Hayes: Yes. Because life is cumulative. #IB137"

Also, he sends crazy-ass e-mails to Syngenta about the negative effects of their product atrazine.

[–]sooner4life 3 points4 points ago

They are extremely interesting. He visited my university for a speaking engagement a couple years ago, but lo and behold, I had an exam during his talk. I seriously pissed about not being able to hear him in person.

[–]ShiDiWen 4 points5 points ago

So you're telling us that he's a herpetologist?

[–]BobisOnlyBob 7 points8 points ago

Herpetology is a dumb field that should be re-classified (and despite the relevant xkcd, I'm serious, the name of the field is based on a faulty assumption in outdated Linnaean taxonomy)

[–]ShiDiWen 7 points8 points ago

Nice try ornithology board.

[–]snarkinturtle 2 points3 points ago

Herpetology is united by similarities in the ecological, morphological, and physiological similarities of the organisms and a suite of methods (not to mention journals and societies and the traditions that go with them). It's basically the study of ectothermic tetrapods. IMO the relevant criticism about herpetology as a field has nothing to do with its paraphyly (ichthyology, parisitology, microbiology, have the same quirk) but rather the use of clades to delineate any field of study - that is whether fields ought to be grouped based on somewhat arbitrary categories of biological processes rather than arbitrary categories based on branching order of organisms. Of course one could argue that this is a false choice and that one could be a physiologist or an evolutionary ecologist and a herpetologist.

[–][deleted] ago

[deleted]

[–]cheesylobster 34 points35 points ago

Deleted? Can anyone fill us in to what genius anti-joke we missed?

[–]tryingtostudymcats 28 points29 points ago

I hate this. When a comment gets a ton of upvotes and is deleted, I feel like it was probably the greatest comment ever written. And then it was taken away from me.

[–]ytknows 47 points48 points ago

Something along the lines of:

Q: What do you call a website full of people oblivious to their racism?
A: Reddit.

[–]umakemelol 5 points6 points ago

This is what I get for having a social life. Missing out on the joke of the century.

[–]LukeLaehy20 60 points61 points ago

Why are black guys so good at basketball?

Hard work and dedication

[–]washtronaut 7 points8 points ago

Practice.

[–]transformers3 8 points9 points ago

We talkin bout practice?

[–]ocotillo99 346 points347 points ago

Is this some sort of anti-joke that misleads you into expecting a racist punchline, or is there something else I'm missing here?

Disclaimer: I may be an idiot.

EDIT: The comment is deleted now. It said something like "What do you call a black guy with a biology degree? A biologist."

[–]Gitarham 26 points27 points ago

Comment deleted... What did it say?

[–]karsestar 11 points12 points ago

Get your shit together ocotillo99

[–]TommyShambles 418 points419 points ago

Idiot status: CONFIRMED

[–]ocotillo99 327 points328 points ago

The large bold letters make me feel bad about myself.

[–]djkeysr4 108 points109 points ago

And on his cakeday, jeez!

[–]ocotillo99 222 points223 points ago

[–]NancyGracesTesticles 39 points40 points ago

Sometimes you pee your pants at your birthday party. Just pat him on the head, get him some clean pants, and hope he forgets about it in a few weeks.

[–]GenerallySpecific 12 points13 points ago

7th birthday, locked out my own birthday party accidentally. Peed. All my friends there. Worst birthday ever.

[–]Excentinel 4 points5 points ago

Sometimes you pee your pants at your birthday party.

How drunk to you have to be to not be able to figure out how to work a zipper?

[–]groomingfluid 12 points13 points ago

Moderately.

[–]Absolute_0 16 points17 points ago

Sorry about your cake day bro, tommyshambles is a dick.

[–]binaryechoes 26 points27 points ago

Shit ocotillo99, get it together!

[–]Snikz18 10 points11 points ago

What did the comment say? It's deleted now.

[–]sindrit 8 points9 points ago

Joke explanation: It's a reference to a classic joke where the question is about a black airline pilot. It only works when spoken because the pause after the question is the trick. It also has to be delivered to a group of white people that won't want to appear racist. After noone has answered for an uncomfortably long time, you say "Captain, you racist!".

[–]doktm 14 points15 points ago

Yes.

[–]ocotillo99 15 points16 points ago

Yes it's an anti-joke or yes I'm missing something?!

[–]Boss-Nigger 24 points25 points ago

yes

[–]yumagamo 14 points15 points ago

Same here. We must be confirmed idiots.

[–]zCourge_iDX 14 points15 points ago

Wondering the same thing. I don't really see the joke at all

[–]4merFiend 5 points6 points ago

Thanks, Captain

[–]Living_Dead_Girl 2 points3 points ago

You may be an idiot, but happy cakeday!

[–]kabukistar 27 points28 points ago

Only if he's working in his field.

[–]LykaBoss[S] 67 points68 points ago

This made me giggle, a manly giggle of course.

[–]aldude3 29 points30 points ago

A burly, hairy, lumberjack, steel mill worker giggle.

[–]Esparno 24 points25 points ago

We work hard, we giggle hard.

Everybody dance now

[–]TkMyEyes_NotTheShirt 11 points12 points ago

Everybody dance. Now.

[–]Almondcoconuts 53 points54 points ago

ITT: White people with multiple degrees applauding

[–]damnatio_memoriae 13 points14 points ago

How did you know I was applauding?

[–]clooneytoons 18 points19 points ago

he heard you obviously? gosh

[–]Snow_Goon 6 points7 points ago

I thought he had degrees...

[–]Bill_Clintons_Choad 2 points3 points ago

Good I'm not the only one.

[–]maxdougherty 47 points48 points ago

VLSB!

[–]ramo805 24 points25 points ago

[–]sharmander3 90 points91 points ago

GO BEARS!

[–]dark41 11 points12 points ago

Came here to find and upvote this. GO BEARS!

[–]gobearsandchopin 51 points52 points ago

Go Bears.

[–]fearandtuborg 4 points5 points ago

i heard raleighs burned down. :(

[–]blitzfish 32 points33 points ago

[–]aldude3 20 points21 points ago

I love that kids face of defeat.

[–]IAMA_Ghost_Boo 17 points18 points ago

He's way past defeat, that's his face of surrender. Once the milk jug is completely horizontal and the milk has already spilled there's no turning back, it's "How do I explain this to mom?".

[–]aldude3 6 points7 points ago

I like to think that we have all been there.

[–]IAMA_Ghost_Boo 2 points3 points ago

You brought back terrible memories.

[–]BUSSA 19 points20 points ago

aannnd there is my friend's dad on the front page of reddit. He is the chillest dad.

[–]catatonicredditing 28 points29 points ago

Just curious, is this the SAME tyrone we all know and love?

[–]OnlyStandard 39 points40 points ago

No. This one is Tyrone Hayes. The original is Tyrone Rogers.

/DebbieDowner

[–]mojorisin2592 8 points9 points ago

That just takes the racism of this post to another level. And somehow it's funnier now.

[–]euphoric_barley 2 points3 points ago

“Shit Tyrone, Get It Together” is a catchphrase used in various contexts to indicate that a significant improvement needs to be made."

That's the most professional telling of bullshit I've ever heard.

[–]bigsz 44 points45 points ago

Well he looks the same... but then again, they all look the same to me.

[–]layinbrix 32 points33 points ago

thatsracist.gif

[–]bigsz 78 points79 points ago

I was talking about biologists. Who's the racist now?

[–]McBurger 19 points20 points ago

Mike. My friend mike is the racist now.

[–]euphoric_barley 3 points4 points ago

Jesus, I have a friend named mike that's accidentally racist every once in a while. Had to check your user history to make sure I didn't know you.

[–]CurryboiiNZ 15 points16 points ago

[–]DanforthFalconhurst -1 points0 points ago

I violently approve of any usage of this gif. it's the greatest.

[–]roswellthatendswell 5 points6 points ago

He's an amazing professor at Cal. One of the best lecturers I've ever seen.

[–]BullwinkleB 9 points10 points ago

Googled him and found this:

http://gawker.com/5620781/dr-tyrone-hayes-biologist-cock+fixated-megalomaniac-email-addict

Looks like Tyrone still doesn't have his shit together. Dammit, man.

[–]BobCox 24 points25 points ago

Racist OP post = Racist Thread.

[–]drkphd 10 points11 points ago

Good job, Reddit! Keeping the black man down well into the 21st Century! If we keep this up, our ancestors won't be ashamed of us because they'll be just as racist as we are!

[–]Moontouch 3 points4 points ago

Looks like he's done a TED talk too.

[–]GetItTogether 3 points4 points ago

Finally. Now I need to change my username =/

[–]thecascades 3 points4 points ago

This guy came to an environmental law conference in Eugene, Oregon last year that I helped put together. Gave an incredible keynote speech and then came out and got drinks with us. He is the man.

[–]geekoid32 3 points4 points ago

Cal alum here. His Endocrinology class is fantastic and he is unquestionably one of the best lecturers in the department. He once devoted part of a class to share his personal background and he does, in fact, come from very humble beginnings.

For those that are curious, he has been researching how Atrazine, a pesticide, causes feminization and other reproductive disorders in frogs and other animals, including fish and mammals. Great professor!

[–]calrebsofgix 5 points6 points ago

"Good on you, Tyrone, good on you" FTFY

[–]jyoung35789 14 points15 points ago

So... Tyrone is the illegitimate love child of Shaquille O'Neal and Bob Marley?

[–]JasonGD1982 13 points14 points ago

Maybe it could have been legitimate.

[–]AcousticHigh 17 points18 points ago

If it was legitimate, the body would have had ways of shutting it down.

[–]SupermanV3 4 points5 points ago

YEAH WHO IS JYOUNG35789 TO SAY TWO MEN CAN'T HAVE A LEGITIMATE CHILD TOGETHER!

[–]JasonGD1982 5 points6 points ago

TWO BLACK MEN!!

[–]BronzedNipples 6 points7 points ago

I thought this was established?

[–]PBnJames 2 points3 points ago

I got a lecture by him!

[–]danceinmyundies 2 points3 points ago

Hey... this guy taught me endocrinology...

[–]Jay180 0 points1 point ago

Well, Steven Tyrone Colbert is a hell of a guy.

[–]an_enigma 2 points3 points ago

Hey, I've been at the exact spot there, University of Berkeley, that's the Life Sciences building.

[–]ussbaney 3 points4 points ago

I've cried in one of their bathrooms!

[–]MJB25 0 points1 point ago

Tyrone Biggums?

[–]drkfox895 1 point2 points ago

Fail harder.

[–]heliophilic 1 point2 points ago

lolwut was not expecting to see my endocrinology professor on the front page of reddit.

[–]delphinuscn 0 points1 point ago

not funny

[–]romulusnr 0 points1 point ago

Unfortunately, this is not the Tyrone you are looking for.

[–]drkphd 0 points1 point ago

I just want to thank all the engineers and computer scientists, and all the users and voters, for doing their best to create the most effective Racism Distribution Engine of the Twenty-First Century!

If we all try hard enough, we can keep America the kind of place where no matter how much you work or accomplish, you can still get mocked for your race by a bunch of anonymous computer nerds.

Well done!

[–]raysince86 0 points1 point ago

So does that mean we can now call on Tyrone?

[–]TheConndor 0 points1 point ago

I don't understand this post at all. But i've been to this guys class. Can someone explain?

[–]Admiral_Blackwell 3 points4 points ago

For those that don't understand. This may help. It is much funnier in context.

[–]cutuptoe 2 points3 points ago

This guy is an incredible scientist. He has been fighting the biggest herbicide company for his entire career. He claims that the herbicide Atrazine is carcinogenic.....which is used on a large amount of our crops, especially corn.

[–]Ssutuanjoe 7 points8 points ago

why the fuck has this recieved 2000+ upvotes?

  • reddit be racist, son.

[–]branta 5 points6 points ago

Ah the old reddit racist joke. ITT every black guy named Tyrone is the same person.

[–]AquaBear 4 points5 points ago

Holy shit. I'm a Berkeley student (super senior what up!), and I'm taking a class that starts right after Dr. Hayes' class ends (did not know who he was though).

He seems like an upstanding gentleman.

[–]drkphd 4 points5 points ago

Sweet! Racism is the top submission on Reddit! I hope everybody's proud of themselves!

[–]baconator9000 4 points5 points ago

He looks so proud, like a lion. Way to go, Tyrone

[–]Choobaccacabra 4 points5 points ago

Am I missing something, or is this funny just because he's black?

[–]t0mcat 5 points6 points ago

Is this as racist as I think it is?

[–]Rockyrambo 3 points4 points ago

I'm racist...and even i think this is racist as shit.

[–]Hertje73 4 points5 points ago

I dont get it..... Racist joke???

[–]Socially_awkward_pen 11 points12 points ago

Nah, it's based on this http://imgur.com/a/eWV57

[–]drkphd 4 points5 points ago

Yeah, that's another racist joke. That's a joke about a bunch of black people embarrassing themselves and then people mocking them by calling them all Tyrone. HILARIOUS

[–]SinglesRazor 3 points4 points ago

Still couldn't get into Stanford, Tyrone?

[–]palsar 38 points39 points ago

He went to Harvard....

[–]snarkinturtle 76 points77 points ago

At the time he got tenure, he was the youngest tenured prof in Burrklees history. He did his undergrad at Harvard. He is also slightly crazy (like a fox).

[–]chronicallynervous 17 points18 points ago

Berkeley*

It's even in the picture :/

[–]bigsz 7 points8 points ago

Did he teach you how to spell 'youngest'?

[–]snarkinturtle 2 points3 points ago

No, I never took one of his lectures.

[–]SupermanV3 31 points32 points ago

Cold.

[–]aldude3 17 points18 points ago

High Expectation Gangsta

[–]yeathl 4 points5 points ago

Sooooooo... r/funny finally merged with r/racist?

And where the fuck is r/NeilDGT in this hunt!!!!

r/Tyrone just told r/funny to go eat some wet, sloppy shit.